A Note about Sugarbush Draft Horses
I see it over and over again, and no matter how many times it's said, it's still wrong. "Sugarbush Drafts are just an Appaloosa Draft Cross". Uh.... no. The Sugarbush Draft Horse was a breed created many years ago in Ohio. While the initial cross was made using Percherons to Appaloosas, in the many generations following, the breed has been solidified into a consistent type. Saying these horses are "just" a draft cross makes as much sense as saying that AQHA horses are "just" a Thoroughbred cross, American Cream Drafts are "just" a dilute Belgian, or that Morgans are "just" a grade.
Friday, August 12, 2011
Fear Friday: The Nay Sayers
Don't you just love it when you admit that you don't feel comfortable with it, and some brilliant mind says "Well, just try harder" or "you won't get over your problem until you do it" or some other amazing piece of wisdom? I'm sure there's a word for these types of phrases, but I don't know what it is.
I often wonder if those people think we just haven't tried to handle our fears, and need their short sentence advice to suddenly make it all better. I mean, it's not like we don't hear this stuff all the time, right? But said in THEIR voice, it's suddenly going to be the miracle words we need?
Even worse are those who add in comments to make you feel like you are failing. Things like, "if you never push yourself there's no way you will..."
Now, I'm lucky. Most of my friends and riding partners have dealt with, or are dealing with some type of fears of their own. When one of us says, "I'm not sure" that's all we need. And since I've started the dialogue about fears, it seems that people who never wanted to admit their own fears are starting to feel at ease about it. We all have them, about SOMEthing, and it's so much easier to have fun with no one is freaked out.
But, my friends are hand picked, not just people I run into some place. Boarding barns, events, shows.... in those places you're likely to meet the Nay Sayers. These are the people who want to feel better about themselves by putting some one else down. At least that's the only thing I can think of for why they would make such types of comments.
When my friends are afraid of something, I try to HELP them, not belittle them. I work hard to make sure that my advice is sensible, and takes into consideration that they have brains, and use them. Evidently not everyone does this.
I train horses. I help people ride better. I have people ask for my advice on a regular basis. This means I have greatly increased my chances for becoming a Nay Sayer! I always worry that somehow I will spew words out of my mouth that will harm some one's ability to advance their riding (because it does require a certain level of self confidence!).
So I know what things set me off. The blatant "you suck" type of comments, like "well, you're never going to get better if you don't just get over it". Or even the "Well, I've only been riding for [time] and I can do that!". But there are many more subtle things that annoy each of us. What comments just set you on edge? What types of "helpful" comments make you want to wring someone's neck?
And most importantly, how do we help each other, with out making our friends feel bad?